I am not sure about this one. I guess I was trying to do a descriptive writing, but I am not sure I like this at all. Gotta start somewhere though, right?!
Start Fiction:
Joan wasn't exactly a beauty by any means, but she sure thought she was something.
Gordon had seen his share of women who couldn't accept aging, however she wasn't in denial, either. Joan still acted like she was in her twenties (as her daughter is) just discovering her sexuality.
Some would just call her a whore.
Joan spent a lot of time tossing her poorly colored blondish hair; she tried to strut up and down the hallways; she told sexually explicit jokes; her sexual escapades was her topic of choice to the girls at break; she was delusional, at least obsessed, with thinking she had "stalkers"; she was positive every guy that talks to her is hitting on her; she fed off flirting with anyone who would gobble it up and then complain about it after the fact, of course.
His student workers were more mature, more selfless, caring and giving than this fifty year old woman. Joan hated her job; it was beneath her. When mistakes were made she would argue the proper procedure; she was NEVER wrong. She always had a better story, had done more, and done it better than anyone because she was so special.
Then there was her drinking. Joan never had money for her bills, but Gordon had heard her stories about going out and drinking, eating and pretty much just blowing money she didn't have to spend. Her DUI was not her fault; it was the fault of the drunk guy she had met that night and was taking home because he was too drunk to drove so she had to.
Her divorce: not her fault. He husband was having a midlife crisis. Most guessed he was sick of her; plain and simple. Joan wouldn't talk about her divorce unless she was complaining how she was screwed over by her ex, which lead Gordon to think there was a lot of stories she hid to save face.
As a mother of two, probably soon to be a grandmother, it amazed Gordon that she had as much contact with them as she did. Joan wasn't exactly motherly. Multiple sexual partners, weekend visitors, special friends. No kind of example for a mother to set forth for her young adult children.
It was today he realized how pathetic Joan really was. All her flirting and behavior wasn't about aging, rather she was the most insecure person he had ever come across.
She needed the attention to feel good about herself. Joan needed to be funny, attractive, sexy, loved. If she sat down and no one said anything to her, she would get up and leave upset and sure everyone was mad at her. She was as shallow as they came and she would be the last one to ever figure it out.
The thing that stood out to Gordon the most was the fact that no matter how much attention Joan got, it was never enough. She never really felt better about herself as a person. Then again, would she really be able to, ever?
It would be funny if it weren't so sad.
End Fiction.
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